Posts Tagged ‘parent stress’

Parenting for Peace Primer 3-Pack (w/ videos)

Marcy Axness on kidsinthehouse.comLooking for more parenting peace and harmony? Less stress, fewer meltdowns and more joy? Look no further…but do look, because this features videos!

Our children learn first and foremost by example — our example. The latest brain science reveals that the circuitry of children’s social brains wires up to mirror their parents’ social-emotional brain functioning. This begins in a very direct, biological manner in infancy, and continues through adolescence.

For this and many other reasons related to the potent teaching power of models, a fruitful question to ask yourself, ideally beginning even before you have a child, is “Am I worthy of my child’s unquestioning imitation?” Daunting, yes. But it’s best to realize early on that whether or not you can answer “Yes” to this question, what you see in the mirror is to a great extent what you will see in your child. And, most likely in your child as an adult.

But don’t despair: Nature seems to have built in a special mechanism that allows us to give our children a fighting chance to surpass us. If our children’s potential was constrained by the limitations of our own accomplishment, we’d be doomed! We’d have to wait until our sixties, seventies, eighties — or maybe never — before we’d feel prepared to be parents. Nature has brilliantly built into the system that our children most powerfully respond to our inner life, and especially to the mental force that results when we continually strive to be more connected, sane and centered. (more…)

Ease Parenting Stress Through Mastery

“I had to love her enough to let her hate me.” It was a stunning and very wise thing that Carol Burnett said to the ladies on The View. Burnett said she was scared of her daughter — of saying the wrong thing, making her angry, pushing her away. (She was talking about her late daughter Carrie’s three-year struggle with addiction when she was a teen.)

While Burnett’s situation was extreme, her experience isn’t unusual. Scared, stressed-out parenting has become epidemic: many parents today feel overwhelmed and under-adequate. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Navigating life with kids as a series of crisis management incidents and tactical maneuvers. Not only is that an unpleasant way to live, research shows that parental stress reduces children’s wellbeing. A powerful antidote for stress is action, when it cultivates mastery. (more…)